Raindrops
by edieswan
Summary: It's been a year since Edward left Bella on a street corner in Camden, London. A year on, she returns to the same spot. But will Edward return, too? And what kind of effect will the raindrops have on Bella's mind? Major fluff & Lemons. ONE-SHOT.


**Summary: It's been a year since Edward left Bella on a lonely street in Camden, London. When she returns to that same spot exactly a year on, she waits for him. Will he return? And what kind of effect will the raindrops have on Bella's mind? Major fluff & lemons. E/B**

**Author's Note: I was feeling emotional so decided to write this. It's my first full, proper lemon so let me know what you think! It's angst x one million, as well. You know how I do. **

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It's raining so hard that I can hear the sounds of the water pounding into the ground. The air is so positively humid that I feel like I can't breathe, even though I'm managing to. The rain is so warm and forceful on my skin that I'm being discouraged to move. I want to move, but I don't. I'm stuck here, on this corner, with nothing to do or say. This is the city where it doesn't stop raining. I like the rain; it helps me to forget things.

I didn't use to like the rain. After living in Camden for as long as I could remember, the wet substance that fell from the sky just made the city look dreary and almost black and white. I used to like colour.

I clutched onto the metal fence before me to hold myself together. Even if I did fall, it probably wouldn't have helped, anyway. It was soaking wet and slippery in my half-hearted grip. They say you shouldn't be touching metal in the middle of a storm. They say a lot of things.

No one is here; well, not that I can see. The rain and sky are like a sheath between me and the rest of the human community. The ambience is so overcast and humid that if there was someone near me, I wouldn't even notice. No one comes out on days like this. It's not safe, but I don't care. The rain helps me to forget.

The sky was alarmingly haunting, yet I still felt numb. The prevailing purple colour it held was only evoked an aide memoire of the bruising that I was feeling inside. There was no direct reasoning behind the bruises anymore, but I knew the one thing that it had revolved around.

Him.

It had been almost a year now since I had last seen him. Okay, not almost. It was exactly a year today. A year since I had been standing in the rain at this very spot, in the rain, and where he said goodbye. I probably should have moved or something to prevent tormenting myself every time I had walked past this spot to get to work every morning. It was just a painful reminder of what we used to have and how it was ripped from me with one simple moment.

There wasn't an explanation, although there didn't need to be one. We'd spent the summer together, we were young; fuck, I was still young. The summers in London were still rain-filled, of course they were, but there was still some summer sun. I'd even managed to turn a bit pink on a few days when the sun was out.

We knew each other for six weeks and I'd met him under normal circumstances. I was spending a day off work in Hyde Park with the girls with a glass of wine and a picnic, whereas he had been passing through after watching a football game with the boys. They'd been drinking a lot of beer when they came over to me and my friends.

He'd drunkenly told me that he was going to marry me one day, and we'd spent every day of that summer together ever since. I became unreservedly in love with him.

I should have known that it wasn't going to last, but I made it last as long as I could.

I turned around the corner to give up. It was almost dark anyway, especially with the clouds so ominous. I would go back into my flat and agree that yes, I was completely irrational and a desperate case of "miserable".

That was when I saw him.

"E-Edward?" I muttered, my teeth chattering from the rain.

He walked towards me, still looking like the man that I had fallen in love with over the summer, only older and with a slight beard. He was wearing the same grey suit that he had been wearing when I'd seen him before, only it was pressed this time and cleaner. He seemed to be a lot dryer than I was in the rain.

I started shaking, and it wasn't because I was cold. The face that I had thought about every night for a year was staring at me now, his sharp green eyes piercing into my soul over and over just like they had done the first time I'd met him, and the last. His hair clung to his face, and raindrops fell from his eyebrows and the end of his nose. We were the only ones standing there in the whole street.

He didn't say anything, and I couldn't muster anything else. He could have been a mirage or a signal that I was going crazy. I didn't know – all I knew was that my eyes wouldn't leave his, even though I was willing them to. I couldn't do this to myself; I needed a break.

"I-I…" I began, but still no words came out. It was slightly preposterous.

He stepped a little more towards me, until we were almost touching. I could feel this drag between us; this magnet of lure pulling us closer and closer. I didn't want to give into it; I couldn't. I couldn't put myself through the torment of never seeing him again.

He leaned towards me and I held my breath, painfully anticipating his touch. I still wasn't sure if I would be able to feel it; I didn't even know if he was a hallucination or not.

I felt his finger tips on my bare arm. I felt like I could feel it, but I wasn't sure.

"Bella…" he whispered and nostalgia flooded me, the musical tenors of his voice bringing back inundations of memories and melancholy. I felt like I was going to break down and cry, and it wasn't even ten o'clock yet, which was my usual "break-down" time.

One whole year and I could still remember him as if it was yesterday, right in this spot, _here_, and then, he was gone. Just like that.

He frowned as he stared at me and I noticed how he had a line there which had formed since I had last seen him. I wanted to trace it.

He then held my arm tightly as if he thought I was going to break from his touch. Why wasn't he saying anything? Why wasn't_ I_ saying anything?

The rain continued to pour around us as we just wondered why the hell we were both standing in that spot, a year on. I wasn't sure my psyche was reading this person correctly; Edward wouldn't have come back - it was impossible.

"I came back," Edward began.

He bit down on his lip, eagerly awaiting my reaction. I wanted to tell him how much I had missed him, how I thought of him every day, how I cried every night since he left, how I would do anything for him to hold me again.

I was beginning to get cold and my whole body was vibrating in response to being soaking wet, yet I still couldn't bring myself to do or say anything – just like the time he left me. My white dress that I had been wearing had gone horrifically seethrough, and the absence of a bra only made the cold aesthetically more obvious.

"You're freezing," Edward stated, demonstrating his frown line again as he looked at me.

I shook my head in response. I couldn't feel the cold, yet it seemed like an effort to keep my mouth still and stop my body from shivering.

"Do you still live in the same place?" he asked me, shivering himself as he rubbed my arms for warmth.

I nodded.

"Your lips are blue, Bella. We need to get you inside. You'll catch hypothermia."

I heard my teeth rattle as Edward turned me around and led me back to my flat which was situated almost overlooking where we were standing. He held my two arms from behind as he pushed me through the streets and into the building where he knew that I lived.

As soon as we got into the building, I felt a warm rush of air hit me. It felt nice to be in some place warm, but the real warmth I was receiving was from the fingers that were seemingly placed firmly on my arms. My mind cast back to the moment that he left me again; the almost motion picture that had been replaying over in my head like a broken record, and I moved from his touch.

"I can walk up the stairs by myself," I murmured, shocking myself that I was able to speak.

I walked whilst listening to the squelchy sound made by my sodden shoes hushing up the ceramic floor leading up to my apartment. I was almost in a daze with confusion at the whole situation. Was he really here? What was he doing? And _why_?

I turned around to check that I wasn't imagining things. He was still there and he pulled me towards him.

"I'm seeing someone else," I blurted. I knew I would have to tell him about Jacob the next time I saw Edward, if I ever did again. I'd only been seeing Jake for a couple of weeks. It wasn't anything relevant whilst talking to Edward, but I couldn't think of anything to say.

He edged away from me, but he still pushed me up the stairs and so the squelching continued. He didn't disappear.

We got to the door of my apartment and I was still shivering. My hair was completely stuck to my face, I could still see my pink knickers through my white dress and I smelt pleasantly of rain. Edward watched me as I waited for him, expectant and sort of on tenterhooks. Then I realised that he needed the keys to open the door.

As I reached into my left pocket of the dress, I was stopped with Edward's hands. "Allow me," he whispered as he took the keys, his hand brushing against my thigh as he did so. He didn't seem tentative or reluctant, however. I stared at him, questioning his motives.

He opened the door and motioned for me to go inside as he held it open for me. I walked in as if I were being ushered into someone else's home, not mine. I was besieged with sudden longing and all my veiled emotions that were finally being let out, seeing Edward there in the flesh. There were so many things that I wanted to tell him, and yet my mouth wouldn't move.

"Where are the towels?" he asked, casually and then suddenly, I boiled over.

"Why didn't you call me?" I shouted.

"What?"

"Why didn't you call me?" I repeated, with more emphasis on the "why" this time. "I waited for you. You… you said that…you said you would call me."

"I know," Edward sighed. He wouldn't look at me.

My heart broke all over again as I recounted what I had gone through after he had left. "I waited for you…I waited for you for almost a year!"

He glared at me. "Why can't you just be happy that I'm back?" he yelled, kicking the sofa as he did so. His anger scared me.

"I waited for you," I repeated. I looked down at the floor, a tear slipping from my face as he moved towards me. "And now it's too late," I finished.

Edward was so close to me now that I could feel his breath as he sighed. "But I'm here now."

I still remained unmoved. "That doesn't mean anything, Edward! We were going to… Edward, I was going to _give myself to you!_ I told you I loved you and you…you just left."

"I didn't want to, Bella. Don't act like I did. "

I laughed. "Well, that's a little hard to believe, Edward. Anyway, it's no longer relevant. You're too late."

He looked at me, acting as if he wasn't listening to anything I said.

"It scared me when you said you loved me."

I blushed. I remembered the time I'd said it; it had just come out like verbal diarrhoea. It had shocked me that I had said it so quickly, but I had meant it. I didn't need Edward to know that. I sighed.

"Me too," I agreed.

Edward smiled at me and I remembered how that smile used to make me feel. And it wasn't too different to how it was making me feel now: _dazzled._

I couldn't look at it for much longer; it was too excruciating. I looked to the floor again, self-conscious. It was unreasonable how much I still felt for him. However, he couldn't just come back. It wasn't that simple. I couldn't let him.

"Bella," he said musically, and I looked back up at him, disappointment adorning my face.

"What?" I crossed my arms, shivering.

"You look cold."

"Good one," I replied sarcastically. He was completely right though; I had a pool of water dripping off my dress onto my wooden floor and I had Goosebumps all over my arms.

"I've missed you."

I looked at him. There was evident pain in his eyes and sincerity did line his voice, but my own pain that I had inside of me was tearing at me. I wanted to shout at him; to scream at him and blame him for everything that had gone wrong this year. But I couldn't. All I wanted was for him to pull me closer to him and tell me everything would be okay; that the moment in that spot never happened.

"You needed to live your life Bella. Without me."

I shook my head, my eyes now pink from the tears that had started to fall from my eyes. "Edward, it was the worst thing you could have done to me. You left…without a word. Do you even know how many times my heart has broken since you did that? I can't even answer that, because it's far too many."

I looked out of the window. It was still pouring with rain outside, yet it was almost completely dark now. I let another tear fall out of my eye as I remembered walking back to my apartment in the dark after he had left me.

Edward stormed over to the other side of the room. His anger had seemed to return.

"I never meant to hurt you, Bella! Don't you understand? I don't want you to ever think that. You were the best person I had ever met. I thought about you all the time!"

I sniffed, trying to stop crying. I didn't know whether to believe him or not.

"Edward, you ended it and yes, I'm with someone else now. You can't just go back!" I screamed back, thinking of Jacob.

"I'm not trying to, Bella! I'm trying to help you move forward!"

I started crying again. "Edward, I loved you. But it's too late now. You have to go," I concluded. More tears began spilling from my eyes and I clutched myself to stop myself shivering; water was still dripping from me like a tap. Was I really telling Edward to go?

"Please!" Edward brought his hands to hair and pulled on it violently.

"I can't go through this all again, Edward, I really can't. Please go," I begged.

"Tell me you don't still love me," he said.

"What?"

"If you can honestly tell me that you don't love me anymore and that you love that other guy, then I promise I will leave you alone."

_The ultimatum._

I was torn; I felt for Jacob, but who was I kidding? I had known that Edward was the one for me ever since the day I had met him. I couldn't just stand there and lie; it wasn't in my nature. I just stayed silent as Edward stared at me. He was shivering now, too. He was just as wet as I was now.

He almost stuttered as he spoke. "It wasn't over for me, Bella."

I looked at him with curiosity and sadness. It wasn't over for me, either. I wanted him to take me back in every way that he could possible. I was still irrevocably and unconditionally in love with him and it pained me how ruined things had become. I couldn't do it anymore, even though I so desperately wanted to.

"It still isn't over," Edward said in the most sincere and convincing voice I had ever heard. It wasn't usually that easy to win me over, but he was doing a bloody good job.

He'd done a good job because suddenly, my mind was stripped from reality. Seemingly, so was Edwards and God, I'd missed him.

He ran to me and I ran to him. He captured me with one lift and suddenly he was holding me like he used to. We were cold and wet but it didn't matter. He lifted me up so that I was straddling his waist and then, everything fell into place.

Edward clasped the bottom of my chin and pulled my face up towards him. He pierced me with his eyes one last time and with that, I was gone. I felt his hard cold lips press onto mine, so sincere yet sweet. I surrendered under his touch and felt my soul slip as his kiss completely stitched all of my wounds that he had created back together.

I broke away gradually and was pained to see confusion and disorder in his eyes. Raindrops still fell from his eyebrows and his fringe. His teeth gritted together as he looked at me with yearn and desire.

I couldn't bear his lips to be absent from mine. My lips off their own accord forced themselves back to his and again, I was under his spell. I wanted to cry for how he had he'd left me how he did and his stupid irresponsible persona that I had grown to love, but everything seemed to be irrelevant in this moment.

"Edward…" I groaned in between kisses.

"Ssh," he whispered, put his hand on my behind and carried me to where he had so graciously remembered: my bedroom.

He lay me down on my bed, holding me tightly to his chest still. I hated how rapidly I was falling head over heels once again, but the only emotion overriding everything else felt like a want for him, or more like a physical need.

I immediately fought for his lips, hungrily embellishing him in all of my desire and affection that was engulfing me. I found his hair with my hands and tried to pull myself closer to him, but only to realise that this wasn't possible. Every part of us was touching and congenial shivers were pulsating through the whole of my body. My breath was becoming extremely heavy and my lips were finally forcing a smile.

Edward then moved his nimble fingers to the edge of my dress and then suddenly broke away from our kisses. He looked at me, his eyes black with lust. I could only hope that I was reciprocating the same look, because it seemed that the prominent feeling was definitely being mirrored.

"Bella," he said softly, fingering the hem of the bottom of my dress. "Are you still…have you…with the other…"

I blushed and then stuttered as much as he did. "I'm still a… yes…we haven't yet…"

He removed his hands from the bit under where the edge of my dress met my thighs. "I'm sorry, we don't have to…"

I cut him off. "I want to."

I wanted him to say something, but he remained silent. Slowly, he looked back into my eyes and his gaze never left mine. His lips began to part as he stared and without realising, he was lifting my wet dress from my thighs and up to my hips. I looked down at what he was doing and back to him and exhaled. Say something, I wanted to say, but I too, was speechless. I'd been dreaming of this for just over a year.

He then moved my dress up and I lifted my arms so that he could pull it over my head. Then, I was sat there opposite him with nothing but my underwear on. If only I was competent enough to respond. He clasped my hips still staring at me, almost in awe. If it was possible, his eyes darkened even more and he then inhaled intensely and almost erratically.

"Bella," he spoke at last, and the huskiness of his voice almost made me collapse. He had turned one word, my name, to possess the most desired meaning. I watched him as he gently pushed me back down onto the burgundy covers and brought his mouth to my neck which immediately sent me up to another place. As he lowered his body over mine, I fell gracefully. He continued to kiss me – my neck, my jaw and my shoulders. Every single point of contact with his lips was bliss and intensified the need that flowed freely throughout my body.

I began to sigh and whimper, and then I became scared. I had programmed the intention of never wanting Edward again, yet here I was in his arms. I remembered the last time I had felt this way and told him so, and then he'd gone.

"It's okay," Edward said as he felt me tense. "It's going to be okay. I love you, Bella."

He looked at me darkly and still lust-stricken and suddenly, I no longer cared about the past in this moment. Edward was right. We needed to move forward and the words he had just spoken suddenly cancelled out everything that had ever happened, for the moment. He loved me, and I loved him.

Edward ran his hand along my face, across my neck, then kissing me with fervour and zeal. He spent longer than he had ever done before touching my face and filling me with what seemed like compassion. His hands were then sliding along my waist and electrifying me even more than ever. I fought hard not to lose my consciousness as his touch was already bringing me to my own personal euphoria.

"Bella, I want you," Edward said to me. "I need this with you." I looked at him noticing his eyes hooded with pure lust. I wasn't going to deny his aims – because they were exactly the same as mine.

"I need you, too, Edward. Please," I urged without delay.

He lowered his lips to my cheek, preparing to kiss me there, but I needed more. I wanted to feel his kiss on every inch of my flesh. Instead, I held his head close to mine and his lips then moved down to my chest.

He wanted me to be involved. As he continued to taste me chest as I writhed in pleasure, he had another idea in mind. Heat rushed to the surface of my skin as he grabbed me and then pressed my hand over his hardness. He was encouraging me to touch him in this way, while he emotionally and physically pleasured me all the same. He pulled his trousers and his pants off and for the first time, I saw what made him feel this way.

I grinned without wanting to appear aloof and then pushed Edward onto his back and gripped and stroked the growing evidence of his yearning. Edward continued to hold me close to him, clasping my behind whilst I continued to pleasure him.

I stopped for a second, but only to disengage the buttons on his wet shirt. As soon as his shirt was off, I whimpered at the sight of him. He was even more perfect than I had remembered. He whispered my name softly as I went back down to pleasure him, this time using my lips to kiss his tip, and my tongue to aid the friction along his shaft.

However, Edward was Edward, and I knew that he would want to be in control sooner or later – not that I was complaining. It was his turn to pleasure me and I was everything to do with welcoming. My body needed him, almost like a drug.

Suddenly, he switched me over and his fingers slipped beneath the elastic of my underwear. I stared at him and began to marvel and watched the shape of his finger below the lace. I watched them as they descended lower and lower, and suddenly I was blushing terribly. He smiled at me and then, I was almost unable to breath. Two of his fingers plunged inside of me and I whimpered.

"Mmm," I moaned, astounded as the cold of his fingers met the heat of my body. I arched my back in pleasure.

He carried on, breathing in time with me. I wanted him to stop, but then again, I didn't. If he carried on like this then I was sure that any minute I might explode.

"Edward…" I groaned. "I think I'm about to…it's about to…"I whispered, my voice rough and ragged.

"Bella," he replied. "I want you to. I want you to do it for me."

"I want to…together…"I breathed. It was hard to appear coherent with his fingers so blissfully moving inside of me.

"We will," he promised. "But first do this for me, Bella."

Suddenly, I was no longer able to argue against him. This train of elation wasn't going to cease now; I physically couldn't let it. It was so significantly hard to appear dignified now. I couldn't keep my head up properly in fear of completely convulsing into oblivion. I couldn't fight it.

"Come for me, Bella," Edward whispered in my ear.

And that was all it took. I seized up for an instant, overcome by the force of the impending feeling that was occurring. The release was astounding; better than any other time I had tried by myself.

"Oooh," I cried out, no longer being careful. He closely held me to him as by body shuddered and my breaths grew even more frayed. It was inconceivable how he could make me feel this way. He was incredible, staring at me with such concentration and the look in his agonizingly intense. As I came down, he held me tightly as if he didn't want to let me go.

However, it seemed we were both ready for the next event.

"I want you," I breathed, grabbing him.

"I want you too, you silly girl," he said and kissed me on the forehead.

He then let me go and sat up before me, his eyes staying on mine. I stared at him, too, witnessing his full being in complete view. I looked at him up and then down and then gasping about what he could do to me. I was twenty; I had waited far too long for this and now I was desperate.

My body reacted whilst my mind was elsewhere. I lifted both hands to his neck and then ran them down his shoulders and over his chest. To my delight, he was almost trembling. It was thrilling knowing that I could affect Edward in this way, too. Tenderly, I traced the muscle lines of his stomach and then drew around his navel. When I could resist no longer, I rose and touched my lips to his shoulders, kissing his icy skin with every bit of affection that I had.

He brought his lips up to my face again; he kissed me and lowered his hands to my underwear, gently tugging at the side. I knew what he wanted, and lifted my hips to ask him with my body to come even closer. Together, we removed the final barrier between us. I expected he would look at me then, but the smouldering look that he often portrayed, but he didn't. Instead he kissed my neck and ran his tongue along my jaw line. My body became wild and my heart pumped more furiously in my chest and my skin grew hotter in anticipation of feeling him.

He pulled away from me again and I looked at him, puzzled. What was he doing? Again? I felt his hands between my legs again and ready to protest, but the feeling it brought me prevented me. When I found a moment of sanity and managed to speak, I whispered, "Edward, I need you."

Rapidly, he silenced me with his lips and fought furiously with my tongue, meanwhile still pleasuring me. I was ecstatic. I needed more.

"Edward, I want you inside of me!" I cried, wanting to blush; wanting to cower in embarrassment.

"Patience," he soothed.

I trusted him and welcomed his intentions eagerly. He lowered his mouth fo my beast and then flicked his tongue across my nipple, continuing the motion of his hand in between my legs. I lifted my waist to meet his hand, trying fruitlessly to increase the force, to fulfil the need that his touching was no longer satisfying. I needed to tell him. I needed to be persistent.

"Please, I can't wait anymore. I just _can't_," I puffed.

He was then above me, resting on his forearms, pushing my legs apart with his own, gently, but precisely. He lowered his mouth to mine, and traced my lips with his tongue. He lingered for a while, his face an inch from mine.

"I love you," he said, hoarsely, and I felt his cock almost finally meeting me. Pressing into me with a minor amount, I sighed in impatience, holding onto the bedposts to give me some sort of support. Edward held me closely, his lips hovering over mine whilst he watched me, sensing for how I was feeling as he slightly moved closer to me.

He seemed hesitant, as if unwilling to hurt me. I needed to encourage him. I wanted to give myself to him. The words that I was about to say were, although a painful reminder of what had happened, the truest words I could say.

"I love you, too," I mouthed.

Then, almost too fast for me to notice, he entered me. It happened: we were finally together. An initial pain shot through my lower regions, but then it began to subside and the feeling inside of me was nothing but pleasure.

Edward carried on slowly, thrusting in and out of me with as much care as possible. I tried to keep my muscles relaxed to allow Edward more entry. All I wanted now was to feel him completely and for him to hit every nerve in my body. I whimpered in satisfaction as he picked up the pace.

He went in hard and forceful and suddenly, something was building inside of me that I was not equipped for; something that I had never experienced. Watching Edward was adding to this completely enthralling emotion that was occurring inside of me. He held his intent gaze; one I had experienced from day one and that had completely won me over and made me regret every day of my life that he wasn't there.

Edward returned to my mouth repeatedly for breathless kisses and I smiled knowing that the simultaneous pleasure we were both feeling. Edward breathed my name as he spilled into me, and I clenched around him, swimming in tumultuous waves of pleasure. Every indication of his ardour made mine that more stunning. I drowned as pleasure distended within me. I dug my fingers into Edward's cold and muscular back and clung to him, relishing his last fantastic thrusts as every time they hit me, I groaned in pleasure. He repeated my name, still moaning gruffly, as we came down from the magnificent high that had devastated both of us.

Time stood still for a moment.

I heard him sigh, and then he spun me over to lay on top of him, cupping my face in his hand. He was staring at me now, his eyes marvelling. I waited for him to speak, but he said nothing, only looked at me…looked _into _me. I was still panting.

"Edward?" I said, carefully, caressing his cheek with the back of my hand. Had he been traumatized?

Then, his arms wrapped around me and their force—gentle but firm— caused me to collapse onto his chest. He was holding me to him, his hand on the side of my head, so intently, so desperately. I couldn't have escaped him if I tried. What was going through his head? It wasn't like him not to have something to say. Had this scared him somehow?

I listened carefully for the slightest of words. And then it came, softly, but with determination.

"I'm sorry," he said. "You knew I would have to go."

I closed my eyes, falling into the spiral of depression that had been consuming my life for the past year.

He was leaving again.

But he was right. I did know.

I tightened my arms around my pillow and wept.

I looked over at the side of my bed and to the table that stood beside it. I looked at the photo I had of Edward and I over the summer and then I wept some more. The room was dark now; there wasn't any light shining from anywhere. I was well and truly alone, the darkness just emphasising how awful it was to have lost him. I just wanted it to consume me so I wouldn't have to feel the pain.

Then, the phone rang. I was tempted not to answer it, but it was his sister and also one of my best friends, Alice.

"How are you doing?" she asked me. "We're all thinking about you."

"I'm fine," I lied. "How is the family?"

"Well, mum's obviously crying her eyes out like she has been doing for a while. And Dad, well, you know him. He's keeping a straight face but it's killing him."

"And how about you?" I asked her, another tear slipping down my face.

"I'm like my dad," she replied. "I'm trying to think of celebrating his life a year on, rather than mourning about it."

She was so brave and I was jealous. I was still a needy wreck and then suddenly, I was crying again.

"Bella, do you want me to come over? Because I can. You don't sound good," Alice said on the other end of the line.

"No, it's no trouble, seriously. I can cope," I said, but my mind kept casting back to the spot where it happened and my heart seizing up. "I just feel… responsible, in a way. It won't stop replaying in my head. I miss him, you know?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Bella. How were you responsible for Edward being hit by a bus? It was an accident. A stupid fucking horrible accident. And we all miss him, but he's not coming back."

I thought back to it and my sobs became louder and more violent. He wasn't coming back. He was never coming back.

_I had watched him leave to go back to his place after he had been to mine. We'd had such a lovely day in London – cycling around Hyde Park where we had met, a romantic pub lunch along side the Thames, and that was when I realised that I loved him._

_I didn't have the guts to say it when he kissed me goodbye, when the rain had started and the clouds were ominous. It was even hard to see him in the smog that settled in the humid weather. After he had kissed me goodbye, he began to cross the road._

_"Wait!" I called after him. I needed to tell him. I was going to tell him._

_He turned around in the middle of the road and smiled at me._

_"I love you, Edward," I said._

_He moved closer back to where I was standing, but he never made it. Then the noises, the sirens and the screams started._

_Then everything went black._

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**Author's Note: **Maudlin, I know. It was just something on my sick and twisted mind and I felt like a fluffy lemon. How did you find it? Reviews are not necessary but if you read, I would really appreciate your thoughts.

Edie x


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